Arnold and me

The Terminator and I share something. Neither of us were born on U.S. soil. Neither of us can become President. Capital-P President, that is. Commander-In-Chief.

In his case, he's Austrian, or was, until he married Maria. In my case, my American parents were living overseas on scholarships when I came along.

That's pretty much where the similarity ends. I guess I must be an Economic Girly Man. Which points out - once again - that the Right can only form its thoughts in terms of bullying phrases. The highest highlight of yesterday's proceedings, the cheer that went up after Arnold's invocation of the Girly Man theme was the only thing that woke up the sleeping newscasters. In other news, W was actually officially nominated for coronation yesterday.

Well, I say bravo to all the Girly Men and Girly Women who staged the creative protests yesterday and got themselves busted for exercising their right to free speech and protest. I don't care what those meanies think - the Girly Nation has backbone. Girly Nation can move mountains.

As for the new Ken Doll faces of the Republican Party - Arnold, Mitt, et al - don't be fooled. That's all they are - just pretty faces hiding a mean and selfish agenda. They won't respect you in the morning.

Newsflash: Republicans Descend on New York
"They want to make Apple Pie out of the Big Apple", residents complain.

I must say, I have been bracing myself for the total onslaught of pro-Bush media coverage this week. Sort of like the way I feel as I watch the dentist drill on it's way in to my mouth - painful and unavoidable. Not just painful - it raises the word "discomfort" to a new level of meaning.

But I was not ready for the flip, humourous little ditty NPR just ran about the sanitized experience the delegates are having on Broadway. It turns out that the New York Times spent $600,000 in good old USD to send 13,000 delegates and their families to an afternoon of good old fashioned New York family fun on Broadway. What did these lucky theatergoers get to see? Mamma Mia? Rent? No, those shows are too full of gay people and controversial messages. They got to see Lion King and Fiddler on the Roof - in short, nothing that would challenge their view of the world.

In many ways, this symbolizes for me the Battle of New York.

Back in the 80s, NYC was a really edgy place to go to. It felt like you had to be super aware, super cautious at all times if you didn't know the ropes. You could easily turn the wrong way in Manhattan and find yourself jumped or scammed or whatever. Well, in my last few visits, it's become clear that Manhattan has been turned in to one huge shopping mall in all the visible places. All the small shops that were cool and funky on Broadway have been replaced by Starbucks, Barnes and Noble, J. Crew and Benetton. I mean, I can find all that crap really easily. All I have to do is head over to the Cambridgeside Galleria - or any mall in the USA named 'Galleria', for that matter.

Which is, once again, business as usual. The USA is in the business of exporting its Dittohead, sanitized form of commerce, with all the stupid and scripted merchandise and displays, all over the universe - especially here at home. The unusual must cease to exist; the small business person is the enemy, especially if they espouse a countercultural point of view. All boutiques must be replaced by J. Jill and the Body Shop. That is all.

p.s. here's a copy of the sermon I gave last Sunday.